Paint It Black Read online

  I blinked. “Are you threatening me?”

  “What?” she asked mockingly. “Threaten my own sister?”

  She laughed when I glanced around to see if anyone was listening, but her eyes were hard when she said, “Don’t delude yourself into thinking you’re better than me. I see it in your eyes. You’re ashamed of him. You’re ashamed of me. I’ve always hated you, did you know that? No matter what you did to refuse him, he always talked about you. Well, maybe now he’ll realize that I’m the only daughter who gives a damn about him.”

  She bumped her shoulder into mine and started down the hall.

  “I’ll see you around, Denise,” she called over her shoulder. Cougar emerged from one of the doorways, and she shot him a bird when they passed.

  He grinned at me and circled his index finger by his temple. I had to force myself to return his smile. My hands were shaking.

  Glancing back down the hall, he said, “Did she threaten you? I heard her say she’d see you around.”

  “It’s nothing,” I said. “Just trash talk.”

  Cougar grunted. “She’s a psycho, that’s for sure. But what chance did she have, really? I mean, look at her father. Evil begets evil—”

  “I have to go,” I blurted. I really couldn’t stand to contemplate that line of reasoning at that moment. “Grady’s probably left me by now.”

  Cougar laughed. “Go, then. You’re probably on thin ice as it is tonight.”

  I rolled my eyes and started backing away. “Call me if there’s any word on Angel.”

  “Will do.”

  “And get someone to look at that arm.”

  “Yes, Mother,” he said with a wink.

  I ran back outside. Grady leaned across the seat to push open the cab door.

  “What did Bill want?” he asked with a frown.

  I slid in beside him, and the cab lurched into motion. “He wanted me to work this weekend.”

  Grady threw up his hands. “Of course, he did. Damn it, Necie—”

  “I told him no.”

  Grady paused in midrant and stared at me. “You did? Why?”

  I resumed my position under his arm. “Well, this is a holiday weekend. I want to spend time with you and Abby. I know I missed the big dinner, but we could still go somewhere together.”

  “That sounds nice,” he said, and hugged me close. “And we can still have dinner. Mom sent us some leftovers.”

  Uh-oh … I wondered if I could blame the disappearance on refrigerator trolls. Grady was talking about the weekend, though, so I didn’t interrupt. He sounded so happy and excited. Maybe I had been neglecting him. Neglecting him and Abby both.

  When we got home, Grady poured me a drink, but he didn’t drink any more himself. We stripped and climbed into the hot tub.

  “Hey, Necie,” he said, while he kneaded my shoulders. “I’m not trying to start anything, I swear. But you said something about vacation. I was thinking, now that you’ve captured Barnes—how would you feel about a leave of absence?” He nuzzled my neck. “We could spend more time together, maybe even have another baby, a perfect little boy to go with our perfect little girl?”

  His words chilled me. I wasn’t sure I was a good enough mother for one, much less two. Abby’s conception had been an accident, but one I’d never regretted, even though at times the responsibility scared me to death. I loved her more than anything. I only hoped I could give her what she needed from me.

  And giving up my job? My main goal had always been Barnes, but his arrest didn’t change who I was. I loved my job, and I loved the people I worked with. It scared me to think of walking away from it all.

  “Relax.” Grady slid his hands down my bare arms. “You don’t have to give me an answer right now. Just promise me you’ll think about it.”

  “Okay,” I whispered, and leaned my head back against his chest.

  For the next couple of days, I thought of little else. Grady, Abby, and I spent a nice weekend together as a family. We played board games and baked cookies and even had a pillow fight. No television or Playstation for Abby; no calls to the office for Grady and me. I had to call and check on Angel, though, but in an effort to keep the peace, I’d slip into the bathroom to do it. For the first time, I considered leaving the DEA for good.

  But on Sunday evening, I got a call from Cougar.

  Angel was dying.

  CHAPTER

  4

  With a quick apology to Grady, I raced to the hospital. With the exception of Ubi and Linda, who were on assignment, my whole team waited there with Angel’s mother and teenage sister, Tori.

  We spent a restless night in the intensive-care waiting room with a dozen other families before a nurse told us Angel’s condition had stabilized. It was the most emotional experience I’d ever had except for the birth of my daughter. Looking at the tired, anxious faces around me, I knew I couldn’t quit my job. Grady would never understand … but these people were my family, too. They needed me. I needed them.

  Though he still hadn’t regained consciousness, we celebrated when Angel was transferred out of intensive care and into a regular room. Then we drew up a schedule to make sure he was never alone. Though I spent as much time as possible with my family, Grady made no secret of the resentment he felt when I took my turn sitting up with Angel.

  One night, I was playing checkers with Tori when Tucker showed up to relieve me. I stood and glanced at the clock, thinking that maybe I could make it home in time to read Abby a story before she went to sleep.

  When I looked at Angel, I was startled, as always, to see his dark eyes open and staring through me. He’d only recently started doing that, opening and closing his eyes randomly and in response to pain. Cougar had been so excited about it, but for some reason, I could hardly stand to look into those blank, black eyes that had once been so sparkling and alive.

  I had no sense of him inside there. Still, like everyone else, I talked to him and hoped for the best. Crossing over to him, I pulled the cover up under his chin and bent to kiss the pale cheek his mother shaved every day. “Later, handsome. Tuck is here, and he’s carrying the sports page.”

  Tuck’s beeper went off while I was slipping on my shoes.

  “It’s Bill,” he said, staring at the numbers. “Hang on a sec.”

  “Take your time,” I assured him, and he went outside to use the phone.

  He reappeared a moment later. “Hey, Necie. Can you stay a little longer? I’ve gotta run. It’s the case I’ve been working on. Ubi said he’ll be here as soon as he gets off his shift, but it’ll be three or four hours.”

  “I can stay by myself,” Tori said, but we ignored her. No way was I leaving a fifteen-year-old alone, even if it was at the hospital.

  “No problem. I’ve got to finish kicking Tori’s butt at checkers anyway,” I said with a wink, and she stuck out her tongue.

  After Tucker left, I called Grady to tell him I’d be late.

  “What? Necie, this shit has got to give. You can’t stay out all night and work tomorrow. Tell them to find somebody else. Doesn’t he have family?”

  Afraid Tori could hear him yelling over the phone, I clamped it to my ear and turned my back. “Tuck was called in,” I said softly. “I’ll be home around eleven or twelve. I’ll get some sleep before I take Abby to school. You’ll just have to pick her up tomorrow afternoon.”

  “What about Tiger or Panther or whatever the hell you call him? What about Bill?”

  “Cougar’s sitting with him tomorrow, and Bill is with Tucker. I really have to go.”

  I hung up the phone before he could say anything else. Tori kept her head down, pretending to study her next move, but I could tell by her reddened face that she’d heard enough.

  “I really can stay by myself,” she said.

  “I know that, honey,” I said. “But I don’t want you to.”

  “I don’t want you to get in trouble with your husband.”

  “Don’t worry about him,” I said with a w
ink. “His bark is worse than his bite.”

  Or so I thought, until Angel’s door burst open an hour later. A glassy-eyed Grady barreled inside, with a nurse clutching at the back of his jacket. Tori screamed and scampered toward the corner. Angel jumped, but stared sightlessly ahead.

  “Sir, sir!” the nurse shouted. “Visiting hours are over. If you don’t leave, I’ll have to call security.”

  “I’ll leave, but first I want to know the truth” he slurred. Pointing at Angel’s bed, he said, “Necie, were you sleepin’ with this guy? Is that why you spend so much time here?”

  “Grady!” I gasped, mortified.

  I pushed past Tori and seized Grady from the nurse’s grasp. “I’ll handle this,” I told her.

  “He has to—”

  “I’ll handle it,” I snapped, and pushed Grady out into the hall.

  He stank of sour sweat and Scotch.

  “Where’s Abby?” I demanded. “You’d better not have left her alone.”

  “What kind of father do you think I am?” he said, his green eyes hurt. “I took her to Mom’s.”

  “You took her to your mother’s? On a school night? Were you drunk then? So help me, Grady, if I ever catch you driving with her—”

  “I’m not drunk now.”

  “Oh, really?”

  He gave a defensive shrug. “Well, you weren’t there. Mom doesn’t mind taking her.”

  “I mind, Grady. She’s our kid. We’re responsible for her, not your mother.”

  “Then act like it.” He seized my throat in his hand and held my head against the wall. “I asked you a question. Are you sleeping with this guy?”

  I kicked him hard on the shin and he let go of me. “Don’t be stupid! Angel is a friend. That’s all.”

  “Something’s wrong with our marriage,” he said, and I laughed, my fury kindled like a forest fire.

  Not even caring that the nurse was watching, I grabbed the front of his shirt and pushed him backward. He stumbled and nearly fell. “This is what’s wrong with our marriage. Your drinking.”

  “I drink because my wife is never home.”

  “That’s not true.”

  “Your work gets most of your time, then Abby. Then some vegetable in a hospital bed who doesn’t even know you’re there. When’s my time, Denise?”

  “I’m calling security,” the nurse said, and stalked off.

  “Go home, Grady. We’ll talk about this later. You don’t want to go to jail. Are you driving?”

  “No. I got a cab.”

  “Is he waiting?”

  “I think so.”

  I rode the elevator with him to the lobby, nearly sick with anger and frustration, but helpless to do anything about it. Grady’s drinking was getting steadily worse. I didn’t know if it carried over to his work or not, but I didn’t see how he was going to try a case in the courtroom tomorrow. I loaded him into a cab and paid the driver to take him back home.

  “I love you, Necie,” Grady said. “But I hate the way you make me feel.”

  He slammed the door and left me staring after him when the cab pulled away.

  I tried so hard not to cry while I took the elevator back up, but I couldn’t stop the tear that slipped out when Tori rushed over to hug me.

  “Necie, are you okay?” she asked. “Was that your husband?”

  “I’m okay,” I said. “Look, Tori, please … don’t tell the others about this. I’ll keep him away from here.”

  She stared at me with big, solemn eyes, then nodded. “Would you like a Coke or something?”

  I forced a smile. “That would be great.”

  She scampered away, and I dragged my chair close to Angel’s bed. Those sad, vacant eyes seemed to reflect the despair I felt inside. I dropped my head into my hands and sobbed.

  When I felt a hand in my hair, I thought it was Tori, but it wasn’t.

  It was Angel.

  CHAPTER

  5

  Angel?” I said, and he blinked.

  My tears forgotten, I gripped his cool hand. “Angel, can you hear me?”

  He blinked again, and his fingers twitched in mine. I sensed movement in the doorway and glanced up to see Tori shove the door open with her hip. She backed into the room, clutching a soft drink in each hand and a bag of chips between her teeth.

  She dropped the chips on the tray. “Hey, I hope diet is okay. They were out of regular Coke.”

  My heart pounding, I ignored her and stood over Angel. “Blink twice if you understand me.”

  Angel’s dark lashes fluttered closed once. Twice.

  Tori dropped one of the soft drinks. The can clattered against the floor and rolled under the bed. With a squeal,she grabbed his other hand. “Angel, this is Tori.”

  We both squealed when his head turned toward her and he blinked twice.

  “We should call Mama.”

  “We should call Cougar,” I said simultaneously, and we laughed. “Go!” I shooed her toward the phone.

  In moments, I heard Mrs. Angelino’s excited chatter over the line. Tori grinned and held the phone away from her ear. When she got off the phone, I tried to call Cougar’s cell twice. I got an out-of-area message both times and thought about having the central office page him, but decided to wait. In a couple of hours, he would see for himself.

  I was getting off the phone with Ubi when Angel’s mother arrived. It finally occurred to me that maybe I should page a nurse.

  A male nurse came in a hurry when I told him over the speaker what was going on. “Move over a sec, ladies,” he said, and I tried. Angel gripped my hand with a strength that surprised me. From the look on Tori’s face, he had hold of her, too.

  The nurse laughed. “Be that way, then. If I had a hold of two pretty ladies like this, I guess I’d hang on, too. So, let’s do this like the movies. Blink once for yes, twice for no. Do you understand?”

  One blink.

  “Are you in pain?”

  Two blinks.

  Angel’s mother jumped up and down and crossed herself.

  The next few hours passed like minutes as we peppered him with questions. The most we got in response was a strained “uhhh” or a blink, but he was trying. Better than that, he understood.

  When Cougar walked through the door at midnight, Mrs. Angelino, Tori, and I grinned at him like idiots.

  I laughed when he looked down to check his fly. Giddily, I stood and launched myself at him. He staggered backward under my momentum, but managed to keep us from falling.

  “Whoa!” he said, clutching me. “You been hitting the caffeine again, Neese?”

  I grabbed his hand and dragged him to Angel’s bedside. Angel lay flat on his back, staring at the ceiling. I placed Angel’s hand in Cougar’s and snapped my fingers. “Hey, Beavis, Butthead’s here.”

  Cougar sucked in a breath when Angel squeezed his hand and turned to face him.

  “H-hey there, buddy! Can you hear me?”

  Angel blinked, and Cougar gave a loud war whoop.

  “We need to call your grandmother,” Mrs. Angelino told Tori. “Help me dial out on this thing.”

  While they hovered over the phone, Cougar asked, “Well, what happened? Why didn’t you call me?”

  “I tried. And I don’t know. I was crying, and he—” I paused, embarrassed I’d let that slip. Cougar frowned. “—he patted my head.”

  Cougar stared at him, then back at me. I felt pinned by his gaze, much as I had Maria’s. Then he asked the question I didn’t want to answer.

  “Why were you crying?”

  I flushed and looked at Mrs. Angelino. She was yelling and laughing into the phone receiver.

  “It’s nothing,” I said quietly, so she wouldn’t hear. “Grady was here, drunk, making an ass out of himself. He asked if I was having an affair with Angel.”

  Cougar stared at me for a long moment, then gave me what looked like a forced smile. He clucked his tongue at Angel. “Look at you, man. Lying here in the hospital and still having j
ealous husbands bust down your door.”

  I appreciated his attempt to make light of it, but the mood in the room suddenly seemed tense. I hung around until Mrs. Angelino got off the phone, then made my escape.

  “Wait!” Cougar said. “I’ll walk you to the parking lot.”

  “That’s not necessary—” I began, but he was already moving toward the door.

  We walked side by side down the hall. Cougar kept his head down, his hands jammed in his pockets. I wondered what he was thinking.

  When we stepped onto the elevator, he said, “So, ah … this thing with Grady … you okay to go home?”

  “What? Oh, yeah.” I shook my head. “He’s probably sleeping it off by now.”

  “Are you sure? Because you know you and Abby can stay at my place—”

  Touched and feeling wildly emotional, I kissed his cheek. “Don’t you ever get tired of being such a hero?”

  He grinned and pressed his hand to his cheek. “Nah. The hours are long, but the fringe benefits are outta sight.”

  We laughed and he said, “But seriously … you know I’m here for you. If you need somebody to talk to. If you just want me to whup his ass.”

  I giggled. “Whup his ass? Let me guess … another Southern thing?”

  He snapped his gum and winked. “You betcha. A good one, too. We do that when we see people we care about getting hurt.” Slanting his eyes, he said, “Besides, I can’t talk Boston thug like Angel … or wait, maybe I can.” He cleared his throat, and in a voice that sounded more Rocky Balboa than John Angelino, he said, “Hey, Neese, you want I should throw tha’ guy a beatin’?”

  I snickered behind my hand. “That was terrible.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, okay … it was. I’ll stick with whup his ass. Sounds manlier, anyway.” His eyes shone when he said, “Angel’s really coming back to us, isn’t he?”

  “Yeah, he is.”

  “Look, Necie … If staying at the hospital is causing you trouble at home—”

  “No.”

  “—we could do something else.”

  “No,” I said, louder this time. “I won’t abandon my friends. Grady will have to get over it.”